America is the self-conception of exceptionalism and importance that allows us equate our government with two entire continents. This America is not only the dreams of the hard right conservatives or the center-right liberals. It includes its opposite, the leftist who think of America as uniquely bad. Its still American exceptionalism if you think America is exceptionally evil or corrupt. Because in reality, there is no evil Empire. There is only Empire. The needs, thirsts, tools and ideology of its position vis a vis other countries and people’s. There’s no evil Empire because there is no good or bad Empire, like there is no good or bad serial killer. The act of serial murder is the crime itself. Sure, there are scales and scopes of murders but serial killers are generally not lacking motive only opportunity.
For those of you not in the know, Rob Wohl is my dear friend, running buddy, roommate and straight man. He is The Man Of Many Meetings. The Vanguard Of White Liberal Guilt. The Protector Of Semi-Relevant Leftist Ideologies. A K-Pop Scholar and much more. Here is a list of the titles for the many … Continue reading The Rob Wohl Story
1.My life in the Smaller Yet Still Impressively Vast Left Wing Conspiracy 2. The New New Negro 3. Blacker Than Obama 4. The Blackest Man Around—Why All My Friends Are White 5. The Unbearable Boughieness of Being 6. Vegan Straightedge in the Era of Beer and Bacon 7. Vegan Straightedge [and other things I’ve tried … Continue reading I Reject Your Bourgeoisie Notions and Other Potential Titles For My Memoir
[***disclaminer this satire...well...its funny and not meant to be taken seriously....unless you want to go on a date with me...then it's kinda serious....***] Dear modern day feminist with successful professional careers, I know dating is very difficult for you. You’re beautiful, intelligent and driven which means you have high standards and precious little free … Continue reading Dear Modern Day Feminists with Successful Professional Careers
Earlier this week I sat down to watch an episode of the Office with my roommate. It was an early season of the office, one that I hadn’t watched in few years. I had forgotten just how sexist the “Pam is so hot” subplots are in the office: Michael Scott staring at Pam’s breasts, … Continue reading We Laugh So That We Don’t Cry
Booing Up When All Your Friends Are Lesbians...& You're Not Here it is...the moment [a few of] you have been waiting for. The debut of my play writing prowess...a comedy of queer proportions...the story my dating life as read by my friends...the hilarity that might could be the DC Queer DIY Punk … Continue reading Life Before The Revolution
Dear Father Time, We regret to inform you that your daughter, 2013 has died. We want you to know that our thoughts and well wishes are with you on this most difficult of days. We are so lucky to have known your daughter, even though she was a difficult person to know, we literally could … Continue reading A Farewell to 2013
[For all of you who were unable to make it to my festivus party last night, here is my airing of grievances.] My dear dinner guest. My dear Woodys and Wienberger’s, and my dear Yates and Goggans, and Dalbys, and Kollins, and Divacks, and Cohens, and Also my good Sackville-Bagginses that I welcome … Continue reading I Got A Lot Of Problems With You People!
[Below is an unsent letter to every female friend I’ve been secretly in love with whom I sent really long e-mails to or hand written notes to after/before I went to college/when you were studying abroad/when I moved back to Falcon in 2008/when I moved to Colorado Springs in 2010/when you moved to a coastal … Continue reading Unsent Letter To All The Girls I’ve Loved
I don't what to say about this video. I could talk about some racial issues going on, I could talk about some gender and rape culture issues in lyrics, I could talk about Tom Jones WTF? But mostly I want to say that I love this song. It's cray in the truest sense of … Continue reading Tom Jones…Don’t Know What To Say